Star-spangled

Five stars aren’t always undeserved. The conference and exhibition today in one of the highest rated hotels in Karachi was a good indication of how my humble flat (complete with laundry lying around) is at least seven stars in comparison. I do keep my bathroom clean, even if it is isn’t sparkling. And going into the dining room doesn’t involve squeezing through a back-access corridor from the twilight zone. I’m not expecting exotic luxuries that stimulate the senses, though a projection screen that doesn’t give you a headache and a microphone that works during a key speech would be more preferrable. But a traditionally dressed doorman does pull the handle for you if you’re nice.

In development

A huge progressive organization I‘m familiar with obviously does an online survey like it was just invented. I was to ensure a high response rate by positive user interaction, so I may be biased when I say that part went right – 2,500 completed surveys in 6 weeks. Analyzing more than 60,000 records dumped in an excel spreadsheet, here are a bunch of lessons learned about doing an online survey from Pakistan:

1. Don’t expect your developer to do anything more than code your survey. If you’re thinking about having the information neatly handed over to you in a report (or at least having categorized responses), then you should have listed it in your initial requirements. Because chances are he (in some cases, she) didn’t know you were actually planning on analyzing, he/ she probably thought it was just another one of those mindless instructions that loses its intended purpose once it’s trickled down the various layers of management.
2. Try your best to leave out the ‘Other’ option. This is usually seen as a wonderful opportunity for the majority of Pakistanis to express their creativity, bad English, limited intelligence in understanding how surveys work and aversion towards reading through the list of options and clicking the option they’ve so elaborately misspelled. Incase you need to have it in there, try to make sure the response is standardized in some way or you’ll find a minimum 449 different responses instead of the 6 you expect.
3. Make sure you questions are extremely simple to understand. Some examples of answers to the question ‘Which new services would you like to see offered in Pakistan?’ are “I like to see big services” and “I can’t understand what it means”. Maybe I should have been curt and simply asked “Which new services you want?”

However, I did have a good working relationship with the developer and pivot tables can make up for system generated responses, so it wasn’t entirely unworkable. However, I think developers should be more business-minded and take the time to think about what end-users want, even if they don’t specify it, instead of being fed instructions like a robot. Maybe I’m wrong, but I sure need a better approach next time around.

With the lights out, its less dangerous

It’s our fault really. I mean having to make a couple of updates on our national identity card has caused everyone so much trouble. And just when we’ve decided that things are going smoothly today, the lights go out. As we retire back to the waiting bench and the NADRA center staff gets out the snacks and assumes their daily lights-gone party huddle, no body’s complaining. Nobody’s complaining that the center should get a power generator. Nobody’s complaining that there a million things that they’d rather be doing than sitting in the dark fanning themselves till the lights come back on two hours later. Everybody’s sitting patiently, waiting, even appreciatively, including my wife and I. That’s because the not-so-distant-past had dark stinking dilapidated buildings with red-stains in every corner from tobacco spit, and crabby officials who’d like to make it as hard for you as possible so they could earn a bribe. Now at least the surroundings were clean and computers did most of the administrative work instead of runners fetching and filing dusty papers. We even spent some quality time having a conversation till the lights came back on.

Spread the SMEDA

Here in Pakistan, there’s not much value for a small fry. Neither do most organizations have the slightest clue about what good customer service is.

Thank god for SMEDA (Small and Medium Enterprises Development Authority) then. I could almost spend the afternoon doing that, because these guys actually mean well. That’s saying a lot these days. Sure, they don’t always decide to go ahead and finally pick up the phone, and then it sounds more like the you mistakenly dialed someone’s home number, but when you do get down to business, they’re really quite friendly.

And that’s because they’d really like to help you. They give you the information you need, and even try to get some extra information into your thick skull that’s useful to you in a really nice polite way.

Well, this country depends on SMEs. I won’t miss a beat in recommending SMEDA to anyone who’d like to find out about starting their own business. They even have a great website with well documented helpful information that’s a real gem in my favorites list. You can also call them on 111-111-456.

Feroz in legal services is definitely one of the good guys here, even if he speaks too fast.

Exemplary computer stores

This excerpt has been taken from the popular blog ko.offroadpakistan.com:

Written back in 2004, the writer later updated his post in January 2007. Things are pretty much the same, if not worse.

“Walk into any computer store in Karachi. The likelihood is:

• The person behind the counter doesn’t know much about computers.
• He (and it’s definitely going to be a he) doesn’t really use computers.
• The price will be as high as they think they can get away with.
• Does not realize that he can make his life much easier using the same computers he’s selling to automate much of the mindless software installation and troubleshooting they keep doing.
• Has never heard of automated installs and imaging.
• Customer support… ( no no no )
• Everything will be scattered about in a way to make even the simplest task take at least half an hour.
• Everything will be connected to a single overloaded stablizer, causing all the monitors to flicker like mad.
• There will only be a single phillips head screwdriver in the whole shop, which will be borrowed periodically by someone next door.
• Has never wondered why most of their customers come to him with the same issues over and over again.

The consumer is also to blame, for they are looking for the cheapest possible bargain. As shops mature and improve with time, their prices naturally go up and people shift on to the next crap store around the block. Of course, this being Pakistan, often times as computer shops get ‘established’ the prices start creeping up and the service down.”

Read the complete article here.

A lack of character

Here’s one for the likes of Yahoo! and even our favorite Google.

Why do you allow users to enter more than 200 characters when you don’t allow any more than that?

Average guys like me have to take it to the word editor and bang their heads before reducing their life story to a couple of sentences.

I’ve learnt my lesson the hard way over and over again. I guess I’m just too trusting to believe that the four sentences I’ve put into that text box will be less than 200 characters.

At least its not just Pakistani businesses that can make customers like me go red in the ears a bit. It even includes companies that don’t be evil.

Here in Karachi, we’re all tough customers. I don’t mean that we’re always complaining. Quite the opposite, in fact. We’re all tough customers because no one treats us right!

And like all beaten, hardened and weathered things, we’ve even stopped realizing it. So when the salesperson completes the sale, the tough customer like me is the one who says thank you.

Well, its high time one of us tough customers blogged about how it makes knots in your stomach when the one shop selling the thing you want asks you if you’re planning on buying before being bothered enough to take it off the shelf for you. Or how you wait twenty minutes on the phone for administration to pick up – and the then the staff member shuts the phone on your face mid-sentence.

And I’m still not complaining, really, I’m imploring someone to raise the bar just a little bit, so that us tough customers can maintain some dignity and self-respect. That, and realize that there’s plenty of space for improvement. So if you’re on my side of the counter, then hopefully you’ll realize some tough customer’s going to turn his/ her back some day. That may be your walk-in customer, your college student, or even your employee.

So whenever you’re kind enough to help me with a post, give me your worst customer service ever! Let’s hope you go on to hear from someone else then, how you really don’t seem very educated about customer service, Mr. Bad-service-provider…

Trust me, I’m only trying to help you.